Diddy Kong vs Tails
Description Unknown.jpeg Mario vs Sonic. Which two of these sidekicks will win? Intro Wizard: Today is going to be a video game character battle...since we like video games so much why not have two furry characters fight each to the death? Boomstick: Today on Death Battle is Tails, Sonic's furry little sidekick! Wizard: Also starring is Diddy Kong, Donkey Kong's little sidekick...whose also furry, I guess. He also likes peanuts. Boomstick: Let's start the show, shall we? Diddy Kong Wizard: Now that we've discussed Tails, we should discuss another furry sidekick...who as you know is going to be his opponent. Boomstick: Similar to Tails being Sonic's best friend, Diddy Kong happens to be Donkey Kong's best friend. They've been together on many different adventures. Wizard: Diddy Kong was in fact owned by Rare...which was the reason why the character Donkey Kong Jr. was used instead. This wasn't the case in the Donkey Kong Country games however. There he happened to serve as Donkey Kong's sidekick. Boomstick: Typically he had to wait for someone to knock him out of a barrel though. That person was Donkey Kong himself. Wizard: However, Diddy Kong happened to have a starring role in Donkey Kong Country 2. Why did that happen, you ask? Because Donkey Kong ended up being kidnapped, and he decided that he'd rather rescue Donkey Kong than give up the banana hoard. Donkey Kong simply loved bananas. Boomstick: It wouldn't have been exciting if Diddy Kong simply gave in to King K. Rool's demands. Oddly, he wasn't playable in Donkey Kong Country 3, but anyways...we should talk about his abilities. Wizard: Just as Donkey Kong is superhumanly strong, Diddy Kong is rather agile. However, Donkey Kong is rather agile himself and Diddy Kong is still capable of lifting Donkey Kong, so don't assume that Donkey Kong is slow and Diddy Kong is weak simply because they offset each other. Boomstick: One of Diddy Kong's characteristics is that he has a really strong melon. He has a dashing ability in Donkey Kong 64 because of that. Wizard: He sure does. Donkey Kong Country Returns also portrayed him using his melon to knock the moon out of orbit...of course, that's what we call an outlier but it does prove that Diddy Kong has a strong head. You don't want to be head butted by him, that's for sure. Boomstick: I certainly wouldn't! As you can imagine, Diddy Kong also happens to have his own banana boomerang. He basically learned this technique from his partner Donkey Kong...but anyways, it would probably be useful for a Death Battle so we decided to include that in. Wizard: Did you also know that he can juggle? Before you ask, that's not something that Donkey Kong taught him how to do...though if Donkey Kong set his mind to it he would probably enjoy juggling bananas. You know how much he loves them. Boomstick: He sure does. He can also use an electric guitar to attack his enemies and destroy his surroundings. Wizard: Also, if for whatever reason Diddy Kong leaves peanuts on the ground, he can eat them to restore his health. However, the same also applies to his opponent...so he might want to eat quickly. Boomstick: By the way, why is he always wearing that red cap and vest? Wizard: Perhaps he thinks wearing nothing more than a tie would be embarrassing...unlike his friend Donkey Kong. Boomstick: Yeah...I see where this is going. Wizard: Thanks to that long tail of his, he can also hang from surfaces. Of course, Donkey Kong doesn't happen to have a tail like that, so Diddy Kong can consider himself lucky. Boomstick: However, he has his weaknesses...his jetpack will eventually run out of fuel if he uses it for too long. The same applies to his peanut guns...he'll eventually run out of ammunition if he continues firing them. Wizard: If he ends up stuck in a barrel, he'll have to wait for Donkey Kong to bail him out. Being a sidekick has its drawbacks, isn't that right, Luigi? Luigi: Mamamia... Boomstick: Still, there's a reason why Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong go on adventures together...although for some strange reason, Donkey Kong wasn't playable in Donkey Kong Country 2 or Donkey Kong Country 3...did he have the flu or something? Wizard: He was being held hostage in Donkey Kong Country 2 but I'm not sure if there was an excuse for Donkey Kong Country 3... Boomstick: I'm so disappointed! Wizard: Right...we're expecting a Death Battle so let's give them a show... Tails Wizard: Tails is one of the oldest Sonic characters, having been around since Sonic 2. Boomstick: He's a fox with two tails! Isn't it awesome? Wizard: His real name is Miles Prower...Sonic calls him Tails as a nickname...for obvious reasons. Boomstick: Due to his abnormality, he was bullied during his youth. Personally I think having tails that allow you to fly would be awesome, but apparently the bullies didn't see it that way. Wizard: Fortunately, he befriended Sonic the Hedgehog. They've been going on adventures ever since. Boomstick: Due to his high IQ, Tails is a master engineer...he can drive an airplane. You'd think he'd make a submarine since he can already fly...but apparently Tails doesn't think about what invention he should make before he starts building it. Wizard: Curiously enough, Tails actually had his own adventure before he even met Sonic...despite being rather timid in his youth. He had his own rival back then. Boomstick: Maybe I should play it! Tails has been Sonic's sidekick for quite some time, and has helped him defeat Dr. Eggman time and time again...along with some other foes such as Dark Gaia for example! Wizard: Though Tails is known primarily for being a genius, that doesn't mean that he isn't physically able. He's capable of lifting Sonic and carrying him while flying. Boomstick: He also knows how to swim...something that Sonic will never do. Wizard: Like Sonic, he is capable of using the Homing Dash in order to crash into his enemies. Boomstick: Though he's not as fast as Sonic, Tails is also super fast! In case you were wondering, his real name is a pun on miles per hour. See what they did there? It seems like a pun I would make. Wizard: Probably. Boomstick: Tails is so smart, his intellect rivals Dr. Eggman! Dr. Eggman has an IQ of 300, so that's pretty dang impressive! Wizard: And yes, we decided to use some scaling for that one. You probably know this, but scaling is an important part of Death Battle. Boomstick: When it comes to fighting, Tails is good at improvisation. He can use tree branches, small pieces of furniture, and even painting as weapons! Wizard: Typically Tails has a tendency to fight at long-range, using weapons such as explosives. Boomstick: One of his weapons are the Buddy Bots, which are fast, have strong jaws, and are capable of detonating. Wizard: They're similar to the Remote Robots from Tails Adventures...but since we like the name Buddy Bots better we can call them that. Boomstick: He's also strong enough to carry blocks that weigh several tons...how come his arms don't break? Wizard: Beats me. Boomstick: Another one of his weapons is the Magic Hand, which can extend a distance for punching enemies. Wizard: However, Tails also has his weaknesses, much like Sonic himself. Boomstick: Occasionally, he's lacking in self-confidence! Wizard: He's frightened of both lightning and ghosts, and has a tendency to talk too much. Boomstick: He also claims to get dizzy easily...and yet, this doesn't stop him from using Spin Dash. Wizard: Still, he's one of the oldest Sonic characters, so he's had some time to develop as a character. You could say that there are inconsistencies involving the character though. He wasn't so smart in Adventures Of Sonic the Hedgehog for instance. Boomstick: That show was hilariously bad! And why no Knuckles or Shadow? Wizard: Apparently, the writers were too lazy to get voice actors for them. At least they included Dr. Robotnik... Dr. Robotnik: Snooping as usual, I see! Boomstick: Yeah...perhaps Dr. Robotnik was the only good reason to watch the show. Wizard: What about his mother, Mama Robotnik? Boomstick: Maybe... Death Battle Wizard: We could make Tails fight Luigi, we will admit...but don't you think it'd be more appropriate to make animals fight each other instead of an animal and a human? Boomstick: It's not fox hunting season, right? Wizard: Nope. Boomstick: Alright... At Tails' house... At his house, Tails was busy working on remodeling his airplane. He figured that it could use a new paint job. Hopefully Sonic would like what he saw. However, at that very moment, Diddy Kong walked in. A friendly redneck had told him that there were bananas waiting inside the house. Being a banana lover that he was, Diddy Kong entered the house and went looking for some tasty snacks to eat. But when he looked inside, he didn't find anything of the sort. He wondered where the bananas were. All that he saw were nuts and bolts...and some wrenches. Well, the wrenches sounded like fun. Immediately, he grabbed the wrenches and started throwing them at things. This attracted Tails' attention. "Hey! Stop that!" demanded Tails. Diddy Kong continued throwing wrenches. "Are you trying to pick a fight with me?" asked the fox. "Of course I am! This is a Death Battle!" exclaimed Diddy Kong. "A Death Battle? I don't know, this seems like an awfully petty reason to start a Death Battle if you ask me..." noted Tails. "I'm a video game character! The worst that will happen is that I get stuck in a barrel and I have to wait for DK to bail me out..." said Diddy Kong. "Easy for you to say...what happens if I get killed?" asked the fox. "You can't die! They did an entire video about it!" exclaimed Donkey Kong's sidekick. "OK..." answered Tails. "Wait, if I can't die, then how am I supposed to lose?" FIGHT! Diddy Kong attacked first, launching peanuts at Tails. "Launching peanuts at me? Really?" questioned Tails. "Yes!" exclaimed Diddy Kong. Tails shrugged and decided to pull out one of his inventions. This one happened to be an extends-glove. He used it to punch Diddy Kong in the head. However, it didn't seem to hurt him at all. "Why didn't that work?" asked Tails. "I have a hard noggin...Donkey Kong tells me that all the time..." noted Diddy Kong. "Has he ever hit you on the head?" inquired the fox. "What? No! Of course not! Though sometimes he does hurt my head when he breaks me out of that barrel..." remarked the monkey. "I see..." nodded Tails. Thank goodness Sonic never had to break him out of a barrel. "Allow me to demonstrate!" exclaimed Diddy Kong. Diddy Kong charged directly towards Tails, slamming him against the wall. "Owww! Can we take this outside?" asked Tails. He didn't want to damage his house. Diddy Kong nodded. The jungle seemed like a nice place for them to battle anyway. Tails picked up Diddy Kong and dragged him outside. "Do you ever wish that you could fly?" asked Tails. "I don't have to! I have a jetpack!" exclaimed Diddy Kong. "If you had a jetpack, then why did you have me bring you here?" inquired the fox. "You can lift 100 ton weights, can you?" asked the monkey. "Well, I can, but still!" exclaimed Tails. Diddy Kong took to the skies, still shooting peanuts at Tails. Tails found himself being relentlessly pummeled. "Dang! Well, at least I can take to the skies too..." noted Tails. Immediately, Tails rose to the skies. He proceeded to toss dummy rings at Diddy Kong. Diddy Kong screeched. In retaliation, he threw a banana at Tails. However, he ducked underneath it. At that very moment, Diddy Kong's jetpack ran out of fuel. "Uh-oh!" exclaimed Diddy Kong. Diddy Kong crashed into the ground. "Ow!" shouted Diddy Kong. Stars were around his head. Curious, he noticed that he had landed somewhere near his house. Diddy Kong decided to walk inside. "Where are you going?" asked Tails. "I'm going to play my CD!" exclaimed Diddy Kong. "What CD is that?" inquired the fox. Diddy Kong put the CD into the TV. The Donkey Kong Rap began to play. "Oh no..." said Tails. Diddy Kong danced along with the music, playing his guitar to attack Tails. "Aargh!!!!" exclaimed the fox. Diddy Kong put on his shades and continued playing the music. "Make it stop! Make it stop!" demanded Tails. "Never!" shouted Diddy Kong. Tails banged his head against the wall. "Thank god this is a Death Battle!" exclaimed Tails. "But you said that you can't die!" shouted Diddy Kong. "I wish I could!" bellowed the fox. Suddenly, he stepped on the button to his remote. He had dropped it while he was banging his head on the wall. Shortly afterwards, Tails' plane crashed into the wall, breaking Diddy Kong's TV in the process. "My TV!" shouted Diddy Kong. "See why I wanted to settle this outside MY house?" inquired Tails. Diddy Kong nodded. "Well, Diddy Kong, I'm impressed with your jetpack, but if you really want to take to the skies, you'll need one of these." said the fox. Immediately, he entered the airplane. Diddy Kong looked at the airplane in fascination. "I designed it so that it can surpass the speed of sound...I suppose it's something that you can aspire towards..." noted Tails. "This sounds like fun! I want to try!" exclaimed Diddy Kong. Immediately, Diddy Kong hopped into the cockpit and attempted to drive the airplane by itself. "Stop! You don't have a pilot's license!" shouted Tails. "Wheee!!!!" exclaimed Diddy Kong. "Thank goodness for the autopil-" Diddy Kong smashed it. Tails sighed. The airplane began to spiral out of control, moving erratically. Eventually, it began to head directly towards the ground. "This isn't going to end well..." noted Tails. Quickly, Tails flew out of the cockpit. "Huh?" asked Diddy Kong. Shortly afterwards, the plane crashed into the ground. It exploded. Fortunately, Tails was a distance away when that happened. "Dang...oh well. I can always build another airplane." noted Tails. KO! At that very moment, Sonic approached Tails. "Hey Tails, little buddy! What was the explosion? Were you driving an airplane?" asked Sonic. "Someone...threw a monkey wrench into it." explained Tails. Meanwhile, Diddy Kong was waiting for Donkey Kong to break him out of a barrel...as usual. Donkey Kong did so, busting Diddy Kong out of the barrel. "What have you been up to, Diddy?" asked Donkey Kong. "I flew an airplane! It was awesome!" exclaimed Diddy Kong. "Did you know how to fly an airplane?" inquired the older Kong. "Nope." answered Diddy. Results Boomstick: Now we know why we never let a monkey fly an airplane. Wizard: Diddy Kong was by no means a stupid monkey, but compared to Tails, he was outclassed in the intelligence department. As you may know, Tails has an IQ of 300...which is probably greater than the entire Kong family combined. Boomstick: I know, right! Imagine what would happen if he went up against Donkey Kong in a Sonic trivia game! Wizard: And unfortunately for Diddy Kong, though wielding a gun that can shoot peanuts is rather impressive, it's not as impressive as building an airplane that can break the sound barrier. Boomstick: Tails also had a flight advantage...Diddy Kong did happen to possess a jetpack...but it was bound to run out of fuel sooner or later! Wizard: Diddy Kong's peanut guns would also inevitably run out of ammunition if he used them for too long, which would potentially give Tails a ranged advantage. Boomstick: And believe it or not, Tails went on an adventure of his own before he met Sonic...in other words, he's not as dependent on his partner Sonic as Diddy Kong is dependent on Donkey Kong. Wizard: And since Tails possessed an airplane that could break the sound barrier, it was doubtful that Diddy Kong would be able to keep up for too long...and the machine guns could mow him down. Boomstick: And you can't exactly hijack an airplane if you've never flied an airplane, am I right? Wizard: Probably not. And as we noticed on the Super Mario Wiki, Diddy Kong apparently decided to take on a horde of Kremlings by himself that got him captured, so it would make sense that he can be reckless. This was what led to him losing. Boomstick: I guess Diddy Kong couldn't make a monkey out of Tails! Wizard: The winner is Miles "Tails" Prower."Category:What-If? Death Battles Category:Fattubby